Day One:


Afternoon.


Yeah, this was inevitable. It HAD to happen. there was no other way. I'm reminded of a Keith Green song.
"make my life a prayer to you"

a favorite of mine, first and foremost ( and the part that caught me never to again let me go when I first heard it, part of the chorus:  "I wanna thank you now, for being patient with me, its so hard to see. When my eyes are on me. I guess I just have to trust and believe what you say..."
and he is, God is SO patient with us. He was dreadfully patient with US. with every warning every chance we had to change, but we didn't. And now, he is still patient, giving me THIS chance to grow in him, to live the way I should. I may not have known it was Gods work, if it weren't for ALL the other  chances we had, but with all that, it is VERY clear that it IS in fact Gods work.
This had to happen.
It was the ONLY way we were going to stop.
It was the only way I was ever going to grow up and give myself to God.

It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, to quite the contrary ive never hurt more in my life. But at least I know what I have to do. but then, I always did... only now... heh... now there is no choice.

 EDIT
well I suppose there is always a choice... so lets say this. I choose God.